Stress, Stress, and more stress

         Everything lately has been soooo stressful. I have two more days of spring break left, but even through all of spring break, I have been stressed to the max!! There is so much to think about right now. People say junior year is hard, wait until senior year. It's hard because I'm 18 years old, trying to get good grades in school and at the same time, trying to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life and where to attend in order to do that. 

         I know what I want, I just don't know where to go. I want to be an education teacher but also studying acting. So i would probably double major. However, if I become a teacher, I don't know what I would teach. It would either be Fine arts, theatre, or Family consumer science (like a home ec class; there are a lot of options in family consumer science like nutrition and wellness, culinary arts, fashion design, personal communications, child development, etc.)

        So basically I am on the right track for knowing what I want to do, but I don't know where to attend. I really like Purdue University because they have a really good family consumer science program, but I also think that a community college for the first year wouldn't be a too bad of an idea because of the smaller classrooms and being able to focus on that.

       I don't know, there is just a lot of stress right now that I just need to make it through. I have about 7 weeks left and I want to take my last high school weeks and cherish them, because I can honestly say that I will miss it a ton. Along with all the stress, There are things that I'm really excited about, like Prom and an upcoming trip to California, that I will hopefully go into more detail when the time comes.

"Drive out of the city, away from the town,

I thought heaven can't help me now, nothing lasts forever,

But this is gonna take me down."

"Wildest Dreams" by Taylor Swift

Acting and Singing

            So I haven't been writing recently, i've been extremely busy and we are also on spring break for two weeks !! WOOOOHOOO !!! But something thats kind of been on my mind recently is how when your younger, you don't seem to have a care in the world and you dream big, but then when you're older, those dreams soon deminish. Ever since I was younger, I've always wanted to be an actress/singer because I feel like I have a talent and a story to tell, but as I get older, I feel myself more and more not believing in that chance. A lot of times, we have people around us who tell us what we can and can't be when were older and it just simply sucks because that's all I've ever wanted to be. I have always only seen myself doing that when i'm older and now I guess I am trying to, as my parents say, look at the "reality" of it. And I see there point, it's hard to make it out there, it's a one in a million chance; but I have always felt like I could be that one. Music and acting have always been one of the only things that I've been confident in myself about. When i'm up there doing it, I'm not doing it for anyone but me and I can completely engage myself in it. I've been thinking a lot lately about it because I've been thinking about college. I just wish that I could have a chance to prove myself and this summer, I'm really going to work hard at music and acting. It's what I love to do.

"Take me into your loving arms,

Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars,

Place your head on my beating heart,

Thinking out loud,

That maybe we found love right where we are."

"Thinking Out Loud" by Ed Sheeran